The Dating World: Keeping an Open Heart

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We’ve all heard those reasons for why a relationship just won’t work out.  They become more and more entertaining each time.  “It’s not you, it’s me,” “The timing just isn’t right between us, it should come more naturally,” “I have a lot going on right now and won’t have time to do anything else,” or even better, dropping off the face of the earth without saying a word.  I’ve pretty much heard it all.  It feels fantastic.  Like a giant slap across the face.

I’m not going to lie, even though it becomes more and more hilarious, it still completely sucks each time.  It’s like deep down you’re secretly hoping it’s going to work out between the two of you, but portraying it on the outside like it’s not something to put all of your efforts and energy toward.  After hearing these excuses from each different guy it’s pretty much an instinct now for me not to get high hopes, only to get let down in the end.  I’ve learned to maintain realistic levels of expectations while dating throughout college.

I’m not saying I’ve completely given up – that is the last thing I want to do.  To me, completely giving up is a sign of weakness that I couldn’t bear to handle.  While I do think it is important to focus on your goals, your academics, and your career, especially in your early 20’s, it is also important to find what you like and don’t like and gain relationship experience.

There are plenty of fish in the sea, and I know it’s cliché, but I always like to believe that the person you’re meant to be with is out there, and that all of these bad experiences will all end up being worth it in the end as it leads you to who you’re truly meant to be with.

I think it’s healthy to give yourself a little bit of time to be upset, but not to constantly dwell on one person who clearly is not worth your time.  Once you get knocked down you have to get back up.

Honesty, patience, and keeping an open heart are key components of having healthy relationships and gradually moving on to someone better.

While nearly everyone I knew had boyfriends throughout junior high and high school, I didn’t have my first real boyfriend until I was 18 years old, right after I graduated high school.  I absolutely loved having a companion, someone who just wanted to go out and do things and have fun, like spending warm summer days at the lake, going swimming, going hiking, or even watching movies and being lazy with.  But I had no idea what it was like to be in a relationship, I had never been in one.  For my whole time through junior high and high school I thought the only reaction to a possible relationship meant dropping off the face of the earth without saying anything.  It was weird to adjust to.  A guy who actually wanted to spend time with me for who I was, who wanted to take crazy Snapchat selfies with, post about our fun outings on social media, and treat me with respect, I felt it too good to be true.  Throughout the entirety of the relationship, I always knew deep down “this is great, but this is not the guy who I am meant to be with.”  Deep down in my gut I always knew it wouldn’t work out between us, but I just couldn’t imagine the thought of losing someone who respected me as much as he did, and loved spending time with me.  As the relationship ended during move-in week of college, I felt as if I had hit rock bottom.  I didn’t think there was anyone else out there for me, yet somehow I still knew that it was ridiculous how upset I was getting over him, he clearly wasn’t worth my tears.

As I spent the first semester of college focusing on school, meeting new friends, and keeping up with playing tennis, I realized that I had temporarily given up, and I didn’t like that feeling.  As I changed my attitude and dated more throughout second semester, I learned so much more about dealing with rejection, maintaining an open heart, and never giving up.  As guys came and went leaving the common excuses for why they couldn’t commit, I realized it was nothing that I did, it was all them.  From dating guys with low self-esteem and many insecurities, to guys so self-absorbed with their own lives and schedules, or even just total douchebags who didn’t know how to treat a lady, I learned not to take any of these things personally.

As we all get let down here and there, maintaining realistic levels of expectations and an open heart guide you closer and closer to “the one.”

 

 

Kelsie

 

Weekend Getaway: Wenatchee, Washington

One of the many great things about Summer is the traveling and adventuring that allows you to just go out and explore.  For a day, for a week, or more, adventure is out there.

For a Washingtonian you would most likely think I have been to just about every part of Washington.  But you’d be wrong.  It is my goal this summer to explore the many different parts of Washington that I have never seen before, or was too young to even remember it. Checking one destination off that list, I spent a short fun-filled weekend in Wenatchee, Washington.

Who knew you could see so many sights in Wenatchee?  One of my favorite parts about the 24 hour trip was driving through Wenatchee National Forest and Stevens Pass.  Seeing so many trees, rivers, and mountains, it all reminds me just how appreciative I am to be able to call the Pacific Northwest my home.

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After a 3 hour drive to Wenatchee, I was ready to get out of the car and wander around downtown.  What I didn’t realize by sitting in a cool, air-conditioned car for 3 hours was that it was nearly 100 degrees in Wenatchee.  Since when is Washington ever this hot in June?  The second I stepped out of the car I felt like I was in Death Valley, California.  You know that feeling of sitting in a steam room and thinking that going into a sauna would be a slightly refreshing way to lower the heat even by just a little?  Well, walking around anywhere in Wenatchee even at 6pm felt like permanently walking around in a sauna or steam room, even in the shade.  With sweat dripping off of me, and feeling as if I were 1,000 degrees, I could not wait to get to the hotel to jump in the pool and cool off.

Finally getting to the Best Western Inn by 9pm after the obligatory Red Robin dinner stop, I was able to cool off in the pool.  It was probably one of the greatest feelings.  Like the feeling a big, furry dog feels while sitting in a desert and finally being able to jump into a cool river.  It was awesome.

The next day was even better than the first.  I was finally able to meet up for lunch with relatives that I haven’t seen in what has felt like a decade.  McGlinn’s Public House downtown was the perfect little restaurant to enjoy good food and good company.

After lunch it was time to head back home.  But how can you not stop in Leavenworth on your way home?  Having only driven through Leavenworth a few times, it felt almost necessary to stop and walk through the town.  With it still being nearly 100 degrees outside, every restaurant in the town was misting water over their outdoor seating areas, and the river was nearly packed with people.  Summer is officially here.

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After sitting outside at one of the restaurants, it felt great to be able to walk in the cool, mountain temperature water of the river.  Enjoying a good refresher with a view, why wish to be anywhere else?

Before starting a crazy schedule of work, events and making time for a social life, I enjoyed the perfect weekend getaway that didn’t even cost me an airplane ticket.

 

Kelsie

 

 

Adapting to College Life: Leaving Your Old Life Behind

Do you ever feel like you’re growing up to be the person you’re supposed to be, but don’t know if you’re making the right decision?

Transforming from high school to college is a big step in life, and a huge change.  Some of my very close friends from home always wondered how much I would change as I went off to school and started living on my own.  I never thought I would be one to change too much.  I’m not saying I’ve changed a lot, but I am definitely growing up faster than I thought I would, and stepping out of my comfort zone more than I ever thought I could.  I am a lot more willing to take risks and try things I’ve never tried before, such as different foods I always hated as a child, being more social than in my awkward junior high days, and making more friends.

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As I am close to being in my 20’s I feel as if I’m having slight episodes of mid-life crises.  I kid you not, at least once a day I’ve been asking myself, is this what growing up is supposed to be like?  I definitely feel like myself, but at the same time am constantly feeling like I’m leaving my old life behind.  Is that normal?

Being on the opposite side of the state has slightly disconnected me from friends back home, and maybe that’s ok.  There is nothing wrong with meeting more friends while at college.  But as I spend more time with friends from college and less time with friends from home it feels like I’m leaving my life behind, like I have two different lives in two different places.  I would definitely consider my friends from home and my friends from college my friends for life.  And that’s something I just have to keep reminding myself as I constantly feel like I’m leaving my home life behind.

College is all about fresh starts, trying new things, and finding what you like and don’t like, right?

 

Kelsie

The Struggle of the Teen Years

You know that feeling of believing that you are completely invisible and no one notices you, like you don’t even exist?

That feeling was pretty much my boyfriend throughout middle school and high school. Nothing better than being in a relationship with the feeling of invisibility than an actual person, right?

Between all of the different cliques in school, the popular kids, the smart kids, the jocks, etc. I never felt like I belonged to one.  I’m not saying I was completely friendless, I had my small little group of close friends who also never really belonged to a particular clique in school.  We were like the outsiders.

I would consider my time through junior high school one of the roughest periods of my life. Throughout most of my life growing up I was always the introverted, loser girl who didn’t have any self-confidence or know how to stand up for myself, and would allow others to “walk all over me.”  I believed that everyone else knew me better than I knew myself.  Whatever anybody ever said about me, I believed it to be true.  Each time a school bully left a hurtful comment on my Facebook account, or even made fun of me behind my back at school, I took it very personally, leaving me afraid and feeling like complete garbage.  Each incident that lowered my self-esteem only made me want to be like the cool kids, and try to fit in with everyone else.  I started to experiment more with make-up, flat iron my hair, buy clothes at the “cool” stores, try to be more social, and conform to the social trends that everyone else in my school seemed to be a part of.  While having a mouth full of braces, being shorter than 5 feet, and weighing about 80 pounds, I was trying as hard as I could to look like every other popular girl at school.  Attempting to fit into clothes from the “cool” stores like Abercrombie & Fitch, and Hollister, and spending more money than I had, I thought it would be the key to fitting in.

What I didn’t realize by straightening my hair, wearing make-up, and buying the same clothes everyone else had was that I was trying to be like everyone else, not standing out as an individual, too afraid to be different and embrace my imperfections.  At the time, my definition of “perfect” was a girl who had straight hair, wore make-up, and dressed in “cool” clothes.

Spoiler alert: it’s not worth it.

Looking back at my life as an early teen I always ask myself the same question, why did I care that much?  And how was I once so weak to the point where I couldn’t even stand up for myself?

A quote that I now stand by comes from one of my favorite author’s, Oscar Wilde, who states “Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.”  The quote may be short and simple, but I believe it to be words that early teens should live by, especially during middle school and high school.  What each girl may not realize is that they are all capable of doing great things individually.  To be carefree of what others think and learn how to become a strong, independent young woman is something that feels so great and is something that has personally made me genuinely happy with my life.

While it is nearly every girl’s dream to be with the in-crowd and be popular, it’s important to realize what you like and want for yourself.  This leads to an important question, one that teen girls in particular find difficult to answer: Would you rather be happy while not being “popular,” or unhappy while being “popular?”

What I think is most important for girls to understand, especially during middle school, is that everyone is going through the same thing that you are.  Each girl is going through puberty, growing, and struggling to fit in.  While some may not show what they’re going through, it is important to always know deep down that they really are – everyone has their own story.

I think that most girls in their early teens (ages 13-15) struggle the most with body image and trying to fit in with everyone else, more specifically finding the right clique in the world of middle/junior high school.  However, the struggle of trying to fit in allows you to find yourself and really know who you are when choosing who you want to associate yourself with and the kind of person you want to grow up to be.

As my years of being a teen have come to an end, I realize how much I learned about myself through each experience I went through, and how powerful each experience can be, whether the experience be positive or negative.  I never thought I would be who I am today without each teen experience, and I am grateful that each experience taught me how to grow.

 

Kelsie

Introduction

Hello and welcome to my blog! My name is Kelsie Mosebar and I am a current 19-year-old sophomore at Washington State University in the small town of Pullman, Washington.  As a WSU student I am currently pursuing a bachelor’s degree in Communication with a concentration in Multimedia Journalism, along with a minor in Marketing/Business Administration.

I have lived in Washington my entire life and absolutely love living in the Pacific Northwest.  I am originally from the greater Seattle area and moved to Pullman in August of 2015 as I started my first year at WSU.  Even though I have never lived anywhere else besides Washington, Pullman feels like it’s in a completely different state itself.  Having lived around trees, populated cities, and constant rain in Seattle for 19 years, the wheat fields, rolling hills, and small population of Pullman is a completely different setting and a big change in my life.

Moving on to more important details, you’re probably wondering why I have started blogging and what my blog will be about.

Since about first or second grade I have enjoyed being creative, using my imagination to write stories, writing about the places I travel, and writing about my life experiences.  At that age I had it set in my mind that I would become a Journalism major as I got to college and one day become a Journalist.  As I was an elementary school student, I was the stereotypical “little girl who wrote in her diary.” I would write about dreams that I had, or just about anything for that matter.  But by doing all of this I still had no idea what kind of writing I wanted to do as a Journalist.  All throughout junior high and high school I kept asking myself, “Do I want to write for a magazine? A newspaper? A company website?”  I could never answer my question, I never knew what I wanted to do.  During my first year of college I took introductory classes in my major and continued to study Journalism, hoping that I would finally be able to answer my question.

As just about everyone’s first year of college is a huge change in their lives that is open to new people and experiences, this was the big change in my life that helped me discover what I want to do.  As the second semester of my first year of college came to an end, I finally was able to answer my question and was beyond excited about it.  After experiencing so many new things throughout my first year of college, living on my own, becoming an adult, having a passion for writing and telling stories, and seeing some of the work of my favorite bloggers, I learned that blogging would be the best fit for me and I am very excited where it will take me in the years to come.

Why is my stage name the pacific northwest brunette?

Starting up my blog I did not want to have the super original title of just my name, Kelsie Mosebar.  I decided to add two details about me (being a brunette, and a girl from the pacific northwest) and throw them together to set a name for my blog.

My goal for this blog is to write about my life, such as the places I travel, the things I do, and each life experience.  I truly hope that my blog entries are entertaining, interesting, relatable, and informative to my audience.  I love being able to write about everyday life that everyone else experiences such as the struggles of growing up, the world of dating, learning who you are as a person, and just going about daily life.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read my very first blog post and I sincerely hope you are just as excited as I am about the upcoming of my blog!

 

Kelsie